I never planned to be a mom. It wasn't in my 5 year or 10 year plan. My career is very demanding. Long hours at school. Being escorted out of the school by the custodian night after night. Busy weekends creating plans, grading papers, and all that comes with being an educator in the classroom. When would I have time to care for another being? But God had other plans. Sometimes the best things in life aren't planned.
My son came into my life on the first day of fall over14 years ago. Nothing about his entrance to this world to me was easy. After 22 long hours of hard back labor with no anesthesia, along with the help of a set of blue forceps, a suction cup contraption, three nurses, and the doctor on call whom to this day had to be Conway Twitty, my baby boy was born. A beautiful, perfect 7 lb 13 oz miracle.
At that moment, everything in my life changed. I had another life in which I was responsible for. Someone else to feed. Someone else to nurture. Someone who needed love, and to be cared for. My saving grace. Little did I know that many times this new little life would be my sanity, by detour to some of life's challenges, and the rays in my sunshine.
Sid's first steps, first tooth, first bike without training wheels, first haircut, first t-ball game, first day of kindergarten, first day of middle school, and his first day of high school (in 3 months)- we've been there together. We've struggled together through a diagnosis of ADHD, learning disabilities, divorce, hypoglycemia, and the relocation from the only place we've ever known to a place we hardly knew to start a new life. It's been just he and I through thick and thin.
There are days when I say, "Yes, I truly know why some animals eat their young." And there are days that I hug him and don't want to let him go. Because he's my little boy. I cherish the hand drawn mommy from kindergarten, the hand print t-shirt from first grade, the Roses are Red poem from second grade, and all the handmade cards from the remainder of his elementary years.
Sid and I are beginning a new chapter in our lives. However, one thing will always remain. I will always be his mommy and he will always be my Snuggle bunny.